5. People that change believe and are aware that "The Map Is Not The Territory" or "The Menu Is Not The Meal" and they believe it is their map and their map alone that they operate out of. This is another way of saying that our perception is not reality. It is only our perception of it. However, because it is our perception (our Internal Representation and conceptual meanings) it is what we operate from. It doesn’t matter how accurately it maps (perceive) our present reality. We will operate from our perceptions as governed by our higher-level frames of mind. This means:a. Those who change recognize the value of creating a map (perception) that accurately, as far as symbolically possible, maps the present moment. We are a "symbolic class of life." We do that with the VAKOG and Word meanings acting as "symbols" from our experience of our world through our five senses. But, these are just symbols about our world. They are not the world. We get into trouble when we confuse the two and label our "symbols" as being "real" in the sense that they accurately map out our world. When we consciously or unconsciously operate from frames of mind that we learned in childhood, we certainly are not operating from a map that even comes close to accurately mapping out the adult world we now live in. This is the root of most problems if not all of them.
b. Those who change their thinking by recognizing that their map is not the territory will eliminate the problem of cause-effect in their lives. What do I mean? I mean that the individual who understands and accepts that our internal map/perception is not and cannot be the territory (the external world) will stop the foolishness of believing other people control his or her mind without his or her permission. No one can make you believe or feel anything you choose not to believe or feel.Just because we may have grown up in a dysfunctional family does not mean that we are or have to remain a dysfunctional person even if we learned some poor ways to think and behave. We can "own" our own brain, take control of it and learn new ways of thinking. Brains are very flexible. As an example, think of something unpleasant. Now think of something pleasant. Note how rapidly you can change your thinking. Old unwanted patterns of thinking are just habituated thought patterns that "seem real" because they have become unconscious and "feel" real. But, guess what? They can change.
Now, many have an "invested" interest in getting you to believe that these thought patterns are "real" and that you can do nothing about them. DON'T BUY THAT LIMITING FRAME. You can change these thought patterns. You can "renew your mind." You can think on things that are pure, just, right, lovely, etc. Indeed, you can think on anything you choose to think on. Just give yourself permission.
c. They recognize that the words and images inside our heads are not "real" in the sense that they are set in concrete - they are changeable. They are just "symbols" of the external world. We have instruments that will detect the nerve cells and the neuro-transmitters that allow one nerve cell to communicate with another nerve cell. However, can neuro-scientist go inside the brain and find/measure a picture, a sound, a feeling or a word? No, they are "abstractions" of the mind hence our conceptual states that are generated at the moment of thought and then they disappear until we think the thought again. Because the images and word meanings inside our head are not "real" in the sense that they are set in concrete, they only have the reality we give them.Consider this, think of a mildly unpleasant memory and note what pops into your mind and how you feel. Now, think of a pleasant memory and notice what pops into your mind and how you feel. Which type thinking best serves you? Why would you want to "create" an image and a thought inside your head that makes you feel bad? Have you ever thought about just not doing that anymore? After all, these thoughts aren't real unless you generate them.
How can we use this knowledge? Simple. Since the thoughts including the decisions inside our heads are just thoughts, we can change them as we will. In other words, if you don't like a decision you have made, say "no" to it. Apply "no" to the unwanted decision. When you do this you are meta-stating (applying one thought to another. See #7 below.) the unwanted decision with a higher level "no." What happens when you say "no" to that unwanted decision? Now, create a decision that will serve you and say "yes" to it. Again, you are meta-stating your desired decision with a "yes."
Have you ever thought of this--the only difference between a thought and a belief is that a belief is a thought to which you have said, "yes." A belief is a thought that you have affirmed by saying, "I believe this. This thought is for me." Now, utilize the same processes of the mind in changing original thoughts by thinking other thoughts about them by saying "no" to the decision/thought you don’t want and "yes" to the decision or thought you do want.
How many times do I need to do this? Good question. The brain learns through repetition. Remember how you learned to ride a bicycle or to drive a car? You rehearsed until the knowledge dropped into your unconscious and it became habitual. Do the same thing with saying "no" to what you don't want and "yes" to what you do want. Every time the decision/thought pops up you don’t want, say "no" to it and then immediately say, "yes" to the one you do want. By doing this you are "breaking" the old unwanted habitual pattern and installing a new direction for your mind to go towards--a direction that will best serve you. After all, they are just thoughts so think thoughts that serve you.
