Hold up there, Charlie. The smoke from your tangent is blinding me.

I'm sorry?

It's alright. I just hate to see a young man treat rumor like gospel. Everyone ends up disappointed. First of all, there's no such book as In Bikaner as far as I know. I don't know where the hell that one came from. And A Difficult Woman was a Pixelvision film written and directed by my brother, Abbie. I did some stunt driving on that project and let the crew crash at my house for a couple of nights, but other than that I can't take much credit.

And Paradise Diner?

That's a fish whose legend has grown over the years. It was a short story, a dozen pages, tops. And the title was "Fr. Johnny's Last Ride."

Now wait a minute. I saw that manuscript. It was 500 pages at least.

I'm afraid not.

Yes, it was! I had a chance to read the first chapter.

I'm afraid you've been misled, my friend.

But François Guerif himself showed me -

A (laughing): Oh, I should've known. François is one of my favorite people in all of France. He's published several of my books. He's a wonderful guy. And an inveterate prankster. But don't feel bad. He slipped me a "lost" Willeford and a "suppressed" Marc Behm that had me salivating. We tend to believe what we most wish to believe.

So there's no Calvary Farm or Angry Young Women or Of Castlebar Colony?