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Chuck E. Cheese Arcade: A Place Where Moms Punch Dads In the Face
Chuck E. Cheese, the arcade with robot band, is a violent place. An uninvited kid joined a birthday party. And when the cops showed up, they found a rumble between 40 bloodthirsty parents.
That’s what the chain gets for serving beer to parents already trying to cope with brats and arcade machine sound effects for hours on end. Not to mention the 30 minute performance of the Rocka-fire explosion animatronic band, playing on a 30 minute loop. Also, throw in the parental insincts to protect your kid from being sat on by the fat kid in the ball pit, and you’ve basically tossed a match to the powder keg.
The Made-Up Dramas of the ‘Wall Street Journal’
Lawrence Lessig: I got off the plane from Boston to find my inbox filled with anger about an article in the Wall Street Journal. To those who were angry, I hope you will direct any anger at the Wall Street Journal after you read what follows.
The article is an indirect effort to gin up a drama about a drama about an alleged shift in Obama’s policies about network neutrality. What’s the evidence for the shift? That Google allegedly is negotiating for faster service on some network pipes. And that “prominent Internet scholars, some of whom have advised President-elect Barack Obama on technology issues, have softened their views on the subject.”
Who are these “Internet scholars”? Me. And of course, because I have “softened” my views about network neutrality, and because I advised the Obama campaign about technology issues during the primary, it follows (and obviously so) that Obama too must be…
Traditional Russian Winters Do Not Exist Anymore
The traditional Russian winter with snow and severe frost is gone forever, meteorologists say. Moscow currently faces the deficit which it had never had before, even under the communist rule — the deficit of snow, a well-known German journalist Boris Reitschuster wrote for Bunte Magazine.
Many in the West dream of experiencing the legendary Russian winter with its boundless white magnificence. The blanket of snow used to cover the vast Russian territory already in October. Moscow would normally get snow in October–November. This year is a hideous exception, though.
There is not even a snowflake in the middle of December. There were several humble snowy attempts made, but one will not see even a small pile of snow in Moscow’s streets today. December temperatures in Moscow considerably exceed the norm, whereas December 3 and 4 were registered the warmest winter days in 130 years of meteorological observations.
…
92% of Women Like To Go Solo
MORE women than ever before are taking time out to pleasure themselves, a survey revealed today.
“One of the best things about pleasing ourselves is that it gives us more confidence when we’re intimate with our partners — we communicate better and feel more satisfied which is good for everyone.”
AISD Teacher Throws Fit Over Student’s Linux CD
In an age where Windows and OS X reign supreme, it’s no wonder that a local AISD middle school teacher became enraged after discovering one of her students distributing what she believed to be bootlegged copies of an operating system in class.
While teacher “Karen” was clearly operating under the assumption that she’d scored a minor victory for the Microsofts and other downtrodden software giants of the world, the particular operating system that she ended up disciplining her student for was a freely distributable version of Linux.
To wit, the following is part of an email that the teacher sent to the person who originally provided said Linux to the student:
Mr. Starks, I am sure you strongly believe in what you are doing but I cannot either support your efforts or allow them to happen in my classroom. At this point, I am not sure what you are doing is legal. No…
Hubble Finds Carbon Dioxide on an Extrasolar Planet
Phyorg: The Jupiter-sized planet, called HD 189733b, is too hot for life. But the Hubble observations are a proof-of-concept demonstration that the basic chemistry for life can be measured on planets orbiting other stars. Organic compounds can also be a by-product of life processes, and their detection on an Earth-like planet may someday provide the first evidence of life beyond Earth.
Previous observations of HD 189733b by Hubble and the Spitzer Space Telescope found water vapor. Earlier this year, Hubble astronomers reported that they found methane in the planet’s atmosphere.
“This is exciting because Hubble is allowing us to see molecules that probe the conditions, chemistry, and composition of atmospheres on other planets,” says Mark Swain of NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory in Pasadena, Calif. “Thanks to Hubble we’re entering an era where we are rapidly going to expand the number of molecules we know about on other planets.”
…
A Saturn Moon Teaming with Organic Chemicals: A Galaxy Insight
“So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish!”
NASA’s Cassini spacecraft discovered a surprising organic brew erupting in geyser-like fashion from Saturn’s moon Enceladus during a close flyby on March 12. Scientists are stunned that this tiny moon is so active, “hot” and teeming with water vapor and organic chemicals.
“Enceladus has got warmth, water and organic chemicals, some of the essential building blocks needed for life,” said Dennis Matson, Cassini project scientist at NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory in Pasadena, Calif. “We have quite a recipe for life on our hands, but we have yet to find the final ingredient, liquid water, but Enceladus is only whetting our appetites for more.”
Can fish be far behind?
Why Save Capitalism?
The oft-prophesied collapse of capitalism is looming over our world’s daily supply of goods. The global economic system is on the ropes and must not be allowed to fail. So proclaims government, financial marketeers, tottering czars of industry, media mandarins, and just about everybody else who can pay to be heard. But since their efforts to avert failure have so far inspired little confidence, some attention might be given to Plan B. After all, despite its arcane procedures, capitalism is really just an accounting system, a way of ensuring that the world’s work gets done and that those who do it are properly compensated.
Now I’m not stupid enough to forget that capitalism is also a system that has allowed a substantial though relatively small group of human beings to amass titanic wealth and, so to speak, to capitalize on that wealth by exercising transformative power over the whole planet and…
Pre-Columbian Tribes Had BBQs, Parties on Grave Sites
Some pre-Hispanic cultures in South America had elaborate celebrations at their cemeteries, complete with feasting and drinking grounds much like modern barbecue pits, according to a new archaeological study.
Excavations of 12th- and-13th-century burial mounds in the highlands of Brazil and Argentina revealed numerous earthen ovens. The finds suggest that the graves were also sites of regular festivals held to commemorate the death of the community’s chief.
H. M., An Unforgettable Amnesiac, Dies at 82
BENEDICT CAREY, NY Times:
In 1953, he underwent an experimental brain operation in Hartford to correct a seizure disorder, only to emerge from it fundamentally and irreparably changed. He developed a syndrome neurologists call profound amnesia. He had lost the ability to form new memories.
For the next 55 years, each time he met a friend, each time he ate a meal, each time he walked in the woods, it was as if for the first time.
And for those five decades, he was recognized as the most important patient in the history of brain science. As a participant in hundreds of studies, he helped scientists understand the biology of learning, memory and physical dexterity, as well as the fragile nature of human identity.
Abramelin, the Journal of Poetry and Magick
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.
Greetings! The latest edition of Abramelin, the Journal of Poetry and Magick has been posted to www.abramelin.net.
With a cover by famed UK occult artist Sherri Page, we are featuring a variety of works in this issue, including an amazing chapbook by Abigail Wolford. We hope you enjoy!
Love is the law, love under will,
Vanessa and Erin
Abramelin, the Journal of Poetry and Magick
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law
Greetings! The latest edition of Abramelin, the Journal of Poetry and Magick has been posted to http://www.abramelin.net. With a cover by famed UK occult artist Sherri Page, we are featuring a variety of works in this issue, including an amazing chapbook by Abigail Wolford. We hope you enjoy!
Love is the law, love under will
Vanessa and Erin
Desperate Obama-Haters Give Money to Nigerian Scam
Nobody directly involved will admit it, but this is looking more and more like one of the more nasty, yet brilliant, scams of the last couple years. It may have been pulled off by the legendary Nigerian internet scammers, but it’s beginning to look like it may have been the work of a vast leftwing conspiracy with a twisted sense of humor.
E = mc2: 103 Years Later, Einstein’s Proven Right
It’s taken more than a century, but Einstein’s celebrated formula E = mc2 has finally been corroborated, thanks to a heroic computational effort by French, German and Hungarian physicists.
A brainpower consortium led by Laurent Lellouch of France’s Centre for Theoretical Physics, using some of the world’s mightiest supercomputers, have set down the calculations for estimating the mass of protons and neutrons, the particles at the nucleus of atoms.
Man ‘Carefully Planned’ His Chainsaw Death After Losing Eviction Battle With Developers
Daily Mail: The last resident in a block of flats due to be demolished cut his own head off with a chainsaw to highlight the ‘injustice’ of being asked to move out, an inquest heard today.
Detective Sergeant Mark Huxford told the hearing: ‘The head was still attached by the right shoulder and his head was lying to the left.
Why The Universe May Be Teeming With Aliens
David Shiga, New Scientist: WANTED: Rocky planet outside of our solar system. Must not be too hot or too cold, but just the right temperature to support life.
It sounds like a simple enough wish list, but finding a planet that fulfils all of these criteria has kept astronomers busy for decades. Until recently, it meant finding a planet in the “Goldilocks zone” — orbiting its star at just the right distance to keep surface water liquid rather than being boiled off or frozen solid.
Now, though, it’s becoming increasingly clear that the question of what makes a planet habitable is not as simple as finding it in just the right spot. Many other factors, including a planet’s mass, atmosphere, composition and the way it orbits its nearest star, can all influence whether it can sustain liquid water, an essential ingredient for life as we know it. As astronomers explore newly discovered…
Why Stop Here On Our Evolution From The Ape?
There was a time when the use of animal organs in medicine gave many of us an attack of the moral heebie-jeebies. It was considered bestial, degrading and, well, rather yucky. No longer. Even the conservative Senator Jesse Helms, suffering from a coronary condition in the 1990s, gratefully consented to having a pig’s heart valve, and I suspect most of us, offered a choice of a synthetic or animal part for transplantation, would plump for whatever works best, without giving the ethics a second thought.
It is curious, then, that controversy continues to swirl around other types of animal-human fusion. Last week the Human Embryology and Fertilisation Act, which permits the creation of animal-human embryos, received Royal Assent. The legislation forbids scientists from developing these embryos beyond 14 days (when they are about the size of a full stop) but that has not stopped opponents banging on about “the crossing of…
Why stop here on our evolution from the ape
There was a time when the use of animal organs in medicine gave many of us an attack of the moral heebie-jeebies. It was considered bestial, degrading and, well, rather yucky. No longer. Even the conservative Senator Jesse Helms, suffering from a coronary condition in the 1990s, gratefully consented to having a pig’s heart valve, and I suspect most of us, offered a choice of a synthetic or animal part for transplantation, would plump for whatever works best, without giving the ethics a second thought.
It is curious, then, that controversy continues to swirl around other types of animal-human fusion. Last week the Human Embryology and Fertilisation Act, which permits the creation of animal-human embryos, received Royal Assent. The legislation forbids scientists from developing these embryos beyond 14 days (when they are about the size of a full stop) but that has not stopped opponents banging on about “the crossing of…
Texas C Buck Burnette Learns Why Racist Obama Facebook Updates Are Dumb
For those that don’t know, Facebook status updates are broadcast to everyone you know. So, if you’re going to post something that sounds racist or bigoted, well, don’t. Texas Longhorn lineman Buck Burnette learned this the hard way.
