Crab Vending Machines: For A Living Snack On The Go
The future of fast food that’s alive? Nanjing, China has unrolled vending machines that sell living, crawling Shanghai Hairy Crabs for prices between $1.50 and $7.50, depending on the crustacean’s weight. The units have been placed in subway stations, meaning that there’s a distinct possibility of live crabs getting loose on the train — another stress added to the morning commute.
Gimme Pizza! This Slow Motion Olsen Twins Video Is Creepy…
Via Urlesque:
[Here's] a slow motion version of the Olsen Twins “Gimme Pizza?” Yes, folks, 2010 seems to be the year the internet discovered that slowing things down makes them over 9000 times better.
The slow version of Gimme Pizza is so creepy that you won’t be able to look away. The Olsens’ repetitive dance — seriously, they’re doing the same thing in every shot — is weird enough, but it’s their friends who really steal the show. I’ll be having nightmares about the “whipped cream pouring like waterfalls” kid for a week.
McDonald’s Food Is Immortal!
Photographer Sally Davies has stirred up a lot of interest in the weird science that goes into making McDonald’s “food” resistant to decay. She has an amazing series of photos at her flickr site where you can see daily progress, or lack thereof, of an ageing McDonald’s Happy Meal (example below).
Photo: (c) Sally Davies (www.sallydaviesphoto.com)
According to New York Magazine’s Grub Street blog, Davies plans to keep the experiment going “until something happens, but she’d better be ready for a long haul: A twelve-year-old McD’s burger surfaced a few years ago looking shockingly well-preserved”!
McDonald’s Death Video
I’m no fan of McDonald’s, and as Morgan Spurlock proved, eating too much of the processed junk they pass off as food is calamitous for your health … but this ad from the nonprofit vegan group Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine takes criticism of Mickey D’s to a whole new level!
A Happy Meal 137 Days Later
Artist Sally Davies runs the classic, terrifying “McDonald’s burger time-lapse” experiment. The goal of course is to see how long it takes food from McDonald’s to alter in appearance even the slightest bit. At 137 days and counting, this meal looks identical to how it did at the time of purchase. Via Refinery 29:
Better Living Through Fast Food & Statins
Only some egghead scientists could think this was a good idea! As reported by AFP:
Fast food restaurants could hand out free cholesterol-busting statin drugs with their burgers and fries so customers can offset the heart disease risks caused by the food, researchers said.
Statins lower the amount of unhealthy “LDL” cholesterol in the blood, and a raft of data has shown they are highly effective in fighting the risk of a heart attack.
Scientists at Imperial College London said this week that taking a statin pill could offset the increased risk to the heart caused by the fat in a medium-sized cheeseburger and a small milkshake.
Dr Darrel Francis, from the National Heart and Lung Institute at Imperial College London, said: “Statins don’t cut out all of the unhealthy effects of burgers and fries. It’s better to avoid fatty food altogether.”
“But we’ve worked out that in terms of your likelihood of having a…
Ohio Woman Flies Into a Rage Over Lack of McNuggets (Video)
Feed me! Feed me! WTF lady, it’s not even real chicken … The AP via Google News reports:
TOLEDO, Ohio — A security video from a McDonald’s in Ohio shows a woman punching two restaurant employees and smashing a drive-thru window because she couldn’t get Chicken McNuggets.
The tantrum caught on tape in Toledo earlier this year shows the customer reaching through the drive-thru window, slugging one worker and then another. She then grabs a bottle out of her car and tosses it through the glass window before speeding off.
It happened early on New Year’s Day. Police say Melodi Dushane was angry that McNuggets weren’t being served, because it was breakfast time.
The Latest Mystery Web Trend: Go Ahead and Google 2204355
Culture-jamming or internet prank? Decide for yourself: call it “bullshit” or “it’s really f-d up” in the comments below.
Many news outlets are confused exactly what is the point of this video (deal with the ’80s Nintendo video game sounds at your own risk).
I have tried to figure what the hell this is about, the site Know Your Meme did an exemplar job of why the internet media is even talking about this now, and Matt Zoller Setiz on Salon made a good connection where some of the video was sourced from:
The “As Seen On TV” Diet
Photo: Toddst2 (CC)
In a sort of Supersize Me-type of experiment, scientists have shown what most of us (hopefully) already know: Food advertised on television is not good for you, reported by Science Daily:
Making food choices based on television advertising results in a very imbalanced diet according to a new study comparing the nutritional content of food choices influenced by television to nutritional guidelines published in the June issue of the Journal of the American Dietetic Association.
Investigators found that a 2,000-calorie diet consisting entirely of advertised foods would contain 25 times the recommended servings of sugars and 20 times the recommended servings of fat, but less than half of the recommended servings of vegetables, dairy, and fruits. In fact, the excess of servings in sugars and fat is so large that, on average, eating just one of the observed food items would provide more than three times the recommended daily servings…
The $1200 Burger
Here in burger-mad New York City, seemingly every year there is an outcry over the latest celebrity chef’s outlandishly expensive creation billed as a burger but usually having little in common with the American classic (e.g. Daniel Boulud’s “Royale,” stuffed with red wine-braised short ribs (off the bone), foie gras, a mix of root vegetables and preserved black truffle, for $120). We’ve been trumped, though, by some Aussies, as reported by Reuters:
An Australian cafe is claiming a world record after cooking a giant hamburger with an 81 kg (178 lb) patty that took 12 hours to cook and four men to flip.
The monster burger cooked up by Sydney cafe owners, Joe and Iman El-Ajouz, weighed in at 90 kg in total, eclipsing the previous record of 84 kg, set in Michigan in the United States….
The giant burger contained the giant beef patty, 120 eggs, 150 slices of cheese, 1.5 kg of…
One Nation, Overweight
A serious look at a serious problem – the ever-expanding numbers of Americans who are overweight and obese – arrives on cable TV this evening with CNBC’s documentary One Nation, Overweight. It receives a serious review from Alessandra Stanley in the New York Times, below. (For an alternative, but equally serious, documentary on the topic, disinformation also recommends Killer At Large: Why Obesity Is America’s Greatest Threat.)
There are two Americas.
One is a ruling minority of the healthy few who rely on vegetable gardens, personal trainers and spa getaways to stay fit. The other is the majority of Americans, who are overweight or obese, many of whom risk their own form of assisted living — XXXL clothes, mobility scooters and diabetes treatments that can tip over $50,000 a year.
One Nation Overweight (CNBC)
“One Nation, Overweight” is a CNBC documentary on Tuesday that provides a chilling portrait of a health epidemic that endangers…
White Castle To Sell Candles That Smell Like Disgusting Hamburgers
Miss the smell of low-grade meat?
Starting in May, bottom-of-the-barrel fast-food behemoth White Castle will begin offering a ten-dollar aromatic candle with the “steam-grilled-on-a-bed-of-onions scent” of the White Castle “Slyder” burger.
They have inadvertently created the perfect gift for the stoner in your life.
KFC Buckets For The Cure Pinkwashing Campaign
Mike Adams for Natural News:
Susan G. Komen for the Cure has now crossed the line into asinine idiocy thanks to its new alliance with Kentucky Fried Chicken (KFC), where pink buckets of fried chicken are sold under the slogan, “Buckets for the Cure.” I’m not making this up. See the ad image below:
This idea that buying fried chicken is actually going to cure cancer is one of the most utterly idiotic health ideas yet witnessed in American pop culture. Komen for the Cure is so far gone from reality that the organization apparently doesn’t even think twice about suggesting such an absurd idea. Eat more fried chicken, folks, and then what? Loading up on that kind of a diet is more likely to cause you to kick the bucket than to find a cure for cancer.
Does fried chicken actually promote cancer?
Fried chicken, you see, is coated in starches. The recipe…
Double Down by the Numbers:
Unhealthiest Sandwich Ever?
Congratulations Double Down, you are now the sandwich against which all others will be judged. Via fivethirtyeight:
KFC’s Double Down Sandwich, an in-your-face collection of bacon, cheese and something called Colonel’s Sauce betwixt two fried chicken “buns”, is making waves for its unapologetic gluttony, compelling reviews out of everyone from the New York Times’s Sam Sifton to the Onion’s Nathan Rabin.
But is it really the caloric monstrosity that it appears?
Let’s start with the Double Down’s calorie count: 540 calories for the crispy “Original Recipe” version and 460 for a grilled variant. Those seem like big numbers, but by fast food standards, they’re pretty mild: the Burger King Chicken Tendercrisp weighs in at 800 calories, for instance, and Jack-in-the-Box’s Ranch Chicken Club will set you back 700. Calorie counts for burgers are even higher: 1,320 for a Hardee’s Monster Thickburger, and 1,350 for a Wendy’s Triple Baconator. Even the humble Big Mac, a lightweight by modern standards, contains 540 calories, exactly the same number as the Double Down.
No More Fast Food at Afghan Bases
Game over man, game over. via Reuters:
In the sprawling military base at Kandahar, the fast food outlets facing the axe include Burger King, Pizza Hut, and the U.S. chain restaurant T.G.I. Friday’s that features a bar with alcohol-free margaritas and other drinks — all set along the bustling “Boardwalk” area of the base.
On any given day, the giant square-shaped walkway features the surreal sight of soldiers sipping gourmet coffee and eating chocolate pastries with guns slung across their shoulders, while Canadians play ice hockey at a nearby rink and fighter jets thunder overhead.
The U.S. military says its beef with the burger joints is that they take up valuable resources like water, power, flight and convoy space and that cutting back on non-essentials is key to running an efficient military operation.
“This is a war zone — not an amusement park,” Command Sgt. Maj. Michael Hall wrote in a blog earlier this year.
The KFC Double Down
More like Double Bypass! This thing is both terrifying and captivating, like a harbinger of the apocalypse.
“This product is so meaty, there’s no room for a bun!”
KFC Original Recipe® Double Down
Calories: 540
Fat (g): 32
Sodium (mg): 1380
This one-of-a-kind sandwich features two thick and juicy boneless white meat chicken filets, two pieces of bacon, two melted slices of Monterey Jack and pepper jack cheese and Colonel’s Sauce. This product is so meaty, there’s no room for a bun!
Pepsi Scientists Solve Obesity Crisis With Potato Chips
Now here’s corporate thinking to believe in, gotta please those shareholders. As the author of the article says, eating fewer chips potato chips is not an option. Hamilton Nolan writes on Gawker:
Health food manufacturer and exponentially dimensionalized fulcrum of universal gravity PepsiCo is investing hundreds of millions of dollars in an effort to make America healthier, with things like “designer” salt crystals for Lay’s potato chips. What else could they do?
Because of inherent concern about the health of you, the consumer, PepsiCo spent more than $400 million in product development costs last year, all with an eye towards developing products that will kill Americans more slowly. “What we want to do with our ‘fun for you’ products is to make them the healthiest ‘fun for you’ products,” said PepsiCo chairman Indra Nooyi, emphasizing PepsiCo’s dual commitment to health and to providing a nonstop party in your mouth.
The latest corporate success:…
Could McDonald’s Replace Beef Burgers With Seitan? Would Anyone Notice?
Nick Aster writes on triplepundit:
I sometimes like to write harebrained posts postulating some kind of zany idea. So here’s today’s:
I ate at an airport McDonald’s the other day for the first time in ages. It was at once delicious and disturbing. I looked at the beef. Was it really beef? I mean, seriously, it was definitely some kind of beef-flavored-matter, and the advertisement did say 100% beef. But as I walked off with that greasy post-McDonald’s flavor (that lasts for hours) in the mouth, I got to thinking: that patty was almost no different than the wheat or soy-based stuff used to make vegan food (seitan and so on).
I walked away 100% convinced that McDonald’s could replace all its beef with beef-flavored seitan and NO ONE would notice the difference. McDonald’s would save a fortune, health would be improved, and the carbon and resource footprint of McDonald’s would be massively slashed.
Does…
Mapping The American Burger Wars
The excellent WeatherSealed by Stephen Von Worley graphically illustrates the battle for dominance in the American fast food stakes:
Imagine, if you will, the burger force – a field of energy that radiates from every freshly-cooked patty, earth-penetrating and inverse-squared with distance, compelling the hungry carnivore to seek out and devour the well-done ground beef at the source.
Now, wrap that concept in a Star Wars motif – set in the present day, with the second-tier burger chains as the rebels – each, by themselves, without mutual aid, battling the 12,000-plus restaurant McEmpire. The situation is most dire, for the upstarts control but a few significant islands of territory amid the overwhelming and darkly-rendered influence of the McForce:
Territory controlled by the eight largest U.S. burger chains.
In this and the following graphic, each individual restaurant location has equal power. The entity that controls each point casts the most aggregate burger force upon it, as calculated by the inverse-square law – kind of…
Study Links Soda and Pancreatic Cancer
Many of us know that consumption of sugar (or more likely corn syrup)-laden carbonated drinks is a major cause of the obesity epidemic (see the disinformation® documentary Killer At Large for more on that), but now it seems that they can lead to pancreatic cancer too. Reported by Reuters via RAW Story:
People who drink two or more sweetened soft drinks a week have a much higher risk of pancreatic cancer, an unusual but deadly cancer, researchers reported on Monday.
People who drank mostly fruit juice instead of sodas did not have the same risk, the study of 60,000 people in Singapore found.
Sugar may be to blame but people who drink sweetened sodas regularly often have other poor health habits, said Mark Pereira of the University of Minnesota, who led the study.
“The high levels of sugar in soft drinks may be increasing the level of insulin in the body, which we think contributes to pancreatic cancer cell growth,” Pereira said in a statement.
Insulin, which helps the body metabolize sugar, is made in the pancreas.
