Jesus’ Face Appears In British Woman’s Laundry Sock
It’s common knowledge that Christ manifests himself by appearing in everyday items — here’s his first visitation of 2012. Via the Daily Mail:
This image of Jesus’ face was found on a sock among items of laundry in Kent. Sarah Crane, from Orpington, was stunned when she hung her laundry out to dry and discovered the face of Jesus staring back at her.
I’d left the washing out to dry overnight – and it had probably been sitting there a bit too long when I noticed the face in the sock,’ she said. ‘I called my boyfriend over straight away – we could both clearly see the face of Jesus in the sock.
Miss Crane said she began making a shrine to the sock, but when she moved it, some of its delicate creases fell away and the image is now not as clear.
Is Jesus A Cheap Imitation Of Mithras?
It’s been mentioned, but in this clip from the British show QI, Stephen Fry and co. discuss the strange similarities between the Christian savior and the far cooler and more mystical Roman/Persian god Mithras, who shares the December 25 birthday, and had twelve disciples of his own, and was birthed in the form of a mortal to a virgin mother…
The Gospel Of Supply Side Jesus
Just in time for the holidays, Al Franken’s animated comic tells the biblical story of Supply Side Jesus — basically, a version of Christ the savior updated to be more palatable for the devout conservative Christians of today. Witness the tale of his radical free-market teachings:
If You Are Poor, It’s Because God Hates Your Guts
[Site editor's note: The following is an excerpt from the new Disinformation title 50 Things You're Not Supposed To Know: Religion, authored by Daniele Bolelli.]
The history of Christianity is like a treasure chest for anyone who is fond of contradictions. The Gospels bicker with each other by relating similar tales in very different ways. But even more obviously, Christianity has often so dramatically departed from the words attributed to Jesus as to make you wonder how these glaring contradictions can be justified. Jesus tells you to “Love your enemies” and “Turn the other cheek”? So let’s show how much we love Jesus by waging crusades, inquisitions, witch-hunts, and brutal campaigns of repression against anyone who doesn’t love Him as much as we do. Jesus’s pacifism has drowned in the hyper-violence that has characterized much of Christian history.
But—we may object—most Christians alive today seem to have lost the bloodthirsty enthusiasm of their…
Cartoon Jesus Destroys The World
A vintage film clip depicting the son of God’s vengeful return to Earth for Armageddon, during which he will smash cars, blow up buildings, and smite non-believers harshly and painfully. Seeing one of the bible’s most central predictions in animated form, one realizes that Jesus is essentially the American Godzilla:
Jesus Was A Mushroom
This must have been a mind-bending moment for many viewers. Ancient texts scholar and The Sacred Mushroom and the Cross author John Allegro informs the public know that, Jesus was, in fact, a mushroom. Why don’t I learn facts like this from television today?
Christ as Consciousness
Before a person receives Consciousness they’re just another animal — albeit a sophisticated one. We tacitly assume everyone has Consciousness because people can walk upright, carry on in conversation and generally act civil. However, some people are merely domesticated primates — they only have a highly developed brain supplemented by a complex language system. But you can teach a chimp one of our languages; doesn’t mean they have Consciousness.
This new paradigm, this new consensus that Christ is our personal Consciousness — is key to lifting the veil of ignorance that has kept us in fear of each other. Incidentally, Apocalypse literally means, ‘lifting the veil.‘ This revelation of God within us will unite us on higher mental levels causing, by reflex action, peace on earth.
The original purpose of government and religion was to create in a world where they were no longer needed. They taught us the proper ways to act…
Inside Australia’s Reincarnated Jesus Cult
Alan Miller is an affable young Aussie who claims to be Jesus Christ returned to Earth. (And his girlfriend says she’s Mary Magdalene to boot.) Miller has amassed several dozen worshipers, “television soap stars” among them, who have moved onto his sixteen-acre woodland compound in Queensland to be closer to their prophet. Being the son of God, he naturally has some entertaining life stories up his sleeve, including the time he gave relationship advice to Gandhi (in heaven). Add in a George Harrison hairdo, and you can see the appeal:
Jesus Appears On Walmart Receipt In South Carolina
This is basically the essence of United States encapsulated in a single news story. CBS 21 reports:
An engaged couple in Anderson County says a shadowy image that turned up on a receipt from Walmart looks like the face of Jesus.
Jacob Simmons and his fiancee, Gentry Lee Sutherland, said they bought some pictures from Walmart on June 12. The following Wednesday, the couple had just come home from a church service when Simmons spotted the receipt on the floor of Sutherland’s apartment. He says the receipt had changed. “I was leaving the kitchen and I just looked on the floor, and it was like it was looking at me,” Simmons said.
A dark gray mark on the receipt seems to show two eyes, a nose and a mouth in a thickly bearded face. “Then the more you look at it, the more it looked like Jesus, and it was just shocking, breathtaking,” Simmons…
Jesus Christ is the Greatest Hippie (Rock Star) of Them All (Video)
Quick response to this story, Jesus is actually our greatest “rock star”/”hippie”/countercultural figure of them all (according to this musical), but there is a lot of debate here which I welcome based on the post below. Catholic Church, in my humble opinion, you f-ed up, but I ain’t the Pope.
BTW, if you could bring Carl Anderson back from the dead to play Judas, I would go every week to church again. This man is awesome:
Florida Man Angers His Church By Asking Them to Pray for Soul of Osama Bin Laden (Video)
Brian Hamacher reports for NBC Miami:
The South Florida man whose prayer for Osama bin Laden caused a holy mess at mass this past Sunday is speaking out to defend the bizarre benediction.
Henry Borga paid $10 to put bin Laden’s name on the prayer list at Holy Name of Jesus Catholic Church in West Palm Beach over the weekend, according to WPTV. The name appeared with four others under the mass intentions section in the church’s pamphlet, with a cross next to bin Laden’s name.
While putting the name on the list has caused quite a hubbub, Borga, who said he also prayed for the victims of 9/11, said it was about mercy. “He was a very bad man but he deserved to be punished in life, not by losing his life,” Borga said. “He needs forgiveness and compassion from God.”
The ‘Passion of the Christ’ Whipping Scene (Video)
In case you were wondering what this “holiday” is all about. (BTW, Mel Gibson makes really good movies):
James Frey’s Final Testament Of The Holy Bible
VICE invites in Oprah’s favorite author James Frey to talk about his new book (The Final Testament of the Holy Bible). It features a modern-day Messiah who advocates sex with men and women, drugs, and doing whatever makes one happy.
The interview includes cranks calls, ideas on the end of the world, the cowardly publishing industry and how Frey is bypassing it, art, and the last time he prayed:
Seventy Metal Books That Could Change Our View Of The Bible
Photo: Einarspetz (CC)
A new way to rewrite history: find another version already written. A discovery to rival the Dead Sea Scrolls has seventy metal books found in a cave in Jordan. These books may give a new perspective to the days of Christianity. Via Daily India:
The discovery of seventy ancient metal books in a cave in Jordan is said to have the possibilities of unlocking some of the secrets of the earliest days of Christianity.
The tiny books, their lead pages bound with wire, have left academics divided over their authenticity, but they say that if they are verified, they could prove as pivotal as the discovery of the Dead Sea Scrolls in 1947.
The pages are not much bigger than a credit card, and on them are images, symbols and words that appear to refer to the Messiah and, possibly even, to the Crucifixion and Resurrection.
Adding to the intrigue, many of…
